Sunday, December 12, 2010

Oh NO!!!! What Have I done Wif' Mah Life???


I'se inconsolable. Look at this--jes' LOOK at this. It coulda been mah life, but oh no, I wuz sure bein' reasonable an' reality based t'was the right path. ( I mighta even been a wee bit smug in mah attitude. SOB! now whose smug?)

Here is what the owner wrote Dec 10th of her good fortune:

"'s true. My overseas realtor called ~said he'd found the perfect house with an especially attractive, functional dining room. we packed in a day and were out of here the next. We've already enjoyed our first candelight dinner. Can you stand it?"
(uh, talk about smug?? Ok okokokok! I would be too!)

NO! No no no, I cain't. OH I cain't , I cain't stand it.




Ok....she wuz kiddin' I think...but, but...

But wait! Thar's some real salt in the imaginary wounds!

I innocently follow a few blogs...hunting fer French pottery grating plates (fer grating ginger or nutmeg or garlic)

an' thinkin' to figger out how to use mah bounty of wild greenery on the fireplace mantles
( ohhhh, chicken wire, huh?)

an' what do mah wonderin' eyes see? A French Country House? At Christmas? An' who lives in this house? People who...who... who jes' did it--made it happen.

Ain't foolin' ya' none a'tall , Dear Gentle Bloggers: I thought I might faint over the keyboard. Mah blood pressure dropped to 60 / 20 , 'cause I is in shock, SHOCK!! It might have been Aunty in that house.....if only...if only....what?

If only a thousand other factors had lined up jes' so?

Real life ain't like the movies, ya know, no Meg Ryan scenarios like French Kiss.


Well ole' Belle, it DID for some folks, as ya see very painfully plain, rah'cheer.


Intuitive Eggplant said...

Dang, so beautiful. And so unfair. But what really befuddles me is how anyone could possibly pack up everything in a day. Thanks for sharing, Auntie!

Aunty Belle said...

Ain't it purty??

Well, I think it were a joke--I mean the first one, wif' that gorgeous dining room. But the latter link? Yes, that is a real family who left the UK to become Frenchified.

Of course, Aunty is also jokin'...ah, sorta. It ain't practical a'tall fer me, but thas' jes it, ain't it? Does one always have to be so practical??

moi said...

Oh, Aunty, how I can relate. One evening last year, we were watching some silly movie in which the bad-husband-jilted heroine moves to Tuscany and buys herself a whole new life. S.B. squinted at the screen: "You ever been to Tuscany?" he asked. "Nope," I answered. "Just the southern coast." S.B.: "Sure looks pretty. Where can we get a house like that?" Moi: "In our dreams." S.B. gave me a look, "You mean we can't just pick up the phone and call someone and have them look for a place like that?" Heh. Simple, simple man. If only it were as simple as he made it sound :o).

fishy said...

Note to Moi:
SB can see all he wants to on line at

And Moi, of you won't go with him,
I'll be glad to step forward.

Aunty Belle said...

Okay, Ladies, take yore corners....heh.

Fishy, ain't yore blowfish eyetalian? He'll go wif' ya' if ya ask sweetly. Git Mermaid to be yore chorus. Make Tuscan food every night until he notices a theme. Try it, an let us'uns know. Meanwhile, ooooh what a link.

Moi, wuz it that Dianne Lane movie? Whar' she has to rebuild the villa? A bon-bon of a movie...or mebbe the newer one with a long haired blond chile who heps the aged Redgrave find true love after 50 years?
Mebbe ya could revisit it wif' SB...the man has a point.

foam said...

so, when are we moving?

foam said...

ether who??? lol ....

Karl said...

Good morning Aunty Belle,

Here we have electric light, so you don't have to eat like you're in a medieval castle. Not to mention France is full of well...The French.

Aunty Belle said...

Foamy, let's go! An artistic travelin' companion would be tops!

Ether Capacious? Ya know:

"Scintillate, scintillate, asteriod manific, Fain would I fathom thy
nature specific. Loftily poised in the ether capacious,strongly resembling a gem carbonaceous."

anyone ever tell ya' ya has a cute mind?

foam said...

ahhhhhhhh, hahaha ..
twinkle, twinkle little star, how i wonder what you are .. :)
up above the sky so high
like a diamond in the sky ...........

loooooooooove it!!!

K9 said...

LOL Karl!

i hear the boules in france are terrific. its nice. and they live and eat well and dont dress like slobs. is it too late aunty? what does unca say

Aunty Belle said...
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Aunty Belle said...


Karl is a hoot.

As fer Uncle movin' to france, thang is, I'd have to watch him too close--them french femmes is brazen.

Once in the mists of history we wuz in a shoe boutique (doan tell MOI!) on Rue Cambon.( I know I KNOW--but we's stoopid back then) The proprietess had her spaniel in the shop--Uncle started talkin' huntin' dawgs...the vixen purred at Uncle an invited him to come to her country place to hunt (hunt *what* she did not say) I wuz young enough to be shocked, stunned akshully. Thought I wuz gonna have to throw mah body over him to protect him from that ole' bat...she had to have been at least 40, mebbe even 45. Heh. I wuz a baby- woman then. But. I still have the shoes we bought that day.

moi said...

And you still have Uncle. A puzzle, isn't it, women who not just briefly flirt (which I'm fine with), but who brazenly hit on men who are obviously hitched up?

My recommended response: "See this ring? That means we're married. See this .38? That means I have a temper."

Aunty Belle said...
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Aunty Belle said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Aunty Belle said...



On the whole, however, I has a laid back attitude on the brazen seductress (or did when we wuz young). "Honey, if ya can git him ....he will deserve ya'"

Uncle wuz an accomplished flirt. These days I leans on him to tone it down to age appropriate comments--his age appropriate-- cause I fear some curvy set of jeans is gonna cackle, "stow it Pops" whereupon Uncle will have a heart attack to be addressed suchly.